Knock Knock Hell

Here's some jokes I'll bet The Wiz's 6 Million Dollars you've never heard before: Knock Knock Who's there? Eye. Eye who? Eye BALL! BWAHAHAHAHAHAH Knock Knock Who's there? Chicken. Chicken Who? Chicken LITTLE! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH Knock Knock (sigh) Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? Chicken CHICKEN! And that last one sent my son into spasmodic giggles for at least a minute. I mean, chicken CHICKEN, right after he said Chicken LITTLE? It doesn't get any better than that! Oh please, all ye older and wiser and more experienced mommies, please tell me it DOES get better than that, because if I have to spend another hour in the car listening to jokes like the above, I may just have to shoot myself. We have officially entered the "endless bad and meaningless jokes" stage of life, and I'm pleading for help. How do you teach your child that "chicken CHICKEN!" is not actually a joke? It's not that I'm a humor Nazi, not really. Ok, so I do think that fart jokes aren't actually all that amusing, but beyond that, usually I'm good. But hours of knock knock jokes while we were schlepping our son all over the country these past few weeks gets a little wearing. I suppose I could look at it as 4 year old revenge, some sort of toddler payback for forced time spent on an airplane with no liquids (yeah, that's a post in and of itself, but we just won't go there). If so, my kid could teach the government a lot about torture. In fact, I'm surprised that the CIA doesn't take more notes from parenting classes about how to inflict maximum pain. So, how do you teach humor? Are there books I should get? Shows I should watch? A spear I can impale myself on when the never-ending onslaught of "Mom, say "Knock Knock!" starts? Lemme know. Knock Knock Who's there? Mommy Mommy who? Mommy in a straight jacket WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!


Blogger Tracy M said...

WHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! We are SO there with you right now, and I am ready to hang myself!! I'm gonna try and get a knock knock book from the library, so at least the unending onslaught of jokes might make some sense... The current fav in our house:

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Banana who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Curtain who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

And so on and so on and so on....


8/13/2006 07:59:00 PM  
Blogger Heather O. said...

Actually, Tracy, that last joke did make me laugh...hmmm, are the jokes getting better,or have I just completely lost all notion of humor?

8/13/2006 08:10:00 PM  
Anonymous Nate Oman said...

Actually Heather thinks that fart jokes are very funny...

8/13/2006 08:13:00 PM  
Anonymous Eowyn said...

Are there any really good knock knock jokes?

Mabye "chicken chicken" stems from repeating the banana so many times in the banana knock knock joke?

My little brother's top favorite knock knock would leave him rolling and laughing for at least thirty seconds:

knock knock
who's there?
blueberry buckle
blueberry buckle who?
blueberry buckle your pants!

Blueberry buckle was a tasty dessert my mom made once and only once. However, my brother never forgot that joke.

8/13/2006 10:06:00 PM  
Blogger The Wiz said...

Hey! My 2 year old is currently doing this! He must be BRILLIANT!!! My favorite knock-knock jokes (not of the 4 yr old variety)

Knock Knock
Who's There
UCLA who?
UCLA when there's no smog.

Knock Knock
Who's There
Sam and Janet
Sam and Janet Evening (with song, of course)

8/13/2006 10:40:00 PM  
Blogger Kage said...

My daughter's one and only joke that I love so much:

What does Art start with?
No, a pirate, ARGH.

Thank goodness she has not been introduced to the knock knock joke.

And I am a big fan of potty humor, which will be the ONLY saving grace if I have a boy.

Does this surprise anyone?

8/13/2006 11:11:00 PM  
Blogger Kaimi said...

If it helps any, here's a series that may amuse J and that is marginally better (and my kids can do this one for hours).

Knock knock
Who's there?
Cows say.
Cows say who?
No, silly, cow's say moo. Owls say who.

Knock knock
Who's there?
Ducks say.
Ducks say who . . .

Etc, etc.

8/13/2006 11:19:00 PM  
Anonymous Geoff J said...

I still think "Interrupting Cow" is a great knock knock joke. Cracks me up every time. I'd tell it here but it only works in person...

BTW - Kristen posted on fart jokes once. Read the comments at your own risk...

8/14/2006 01:12:00 AM  
Anonymous Geoff J said...

Oops. Here is Kristen's actual post...

8/14/2006 01:55:00 AM  
Blogger Chrissie said...

I just said to my 3 year old (to be fair, she's 4 in a month) "What's your favourite knock-knock joke Celyn" (that's pronounced Kell-In btw)...anyway (I digress)...and she said...

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Boo Who?
Don't cry Mummy!

:D She cracks me up.

Seriously though, we use a little bit (not too much!) of sarcasm with her (which is terribly British I know) but she so gets sarcasm now and is developing a really good sense of humour. She makes us howl all the time. And I LOL at the "chicken chicken" joke. If you can't beat 'em...

8/14/2006 04:01:00 AM  
Anonymous Beanie said...

So this joke is from one of my SIL

Two fish were in a tank, one fish turned to the other fish and said, "you drive, I'll man the guns"


8/14/2006 09:10:00 AM  
Blogger Mrs. M said...

The one joke that Ethan knows is

Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other SLIDE!

He has good delivery on it, but he tells it over and over and over...

8/16/2006 02:08:00 PM  
Blogger Mo Mommy said...

DH is a big fan of:
A man walked into a bar. He said ouch.
And my little brothers personal fave:
Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
Because they have fat fingers!!
*ROFL* I slay me!!!

8/16/2006 09:00:00 PM  
Anonymous eechupa said...

Hey, I'm stealing most of these jokes for my scouts' pack meeting next week. That's 8 - 11 years olds, they will love it.

you've got a long ways to go before humour develops
me too (heavy sigh)

8/17/2006 04:13:00 AM  
Anonymous john b said...

I've always liked the one where you say you have a knock knock joke and then you tell the other person to start the joke. The other person says knock knock, you say who's there, and then they are stumped because they don't know what the joke is.

8/18/2006 12:03:00 PM  
Blogger Liesl said...

My Dh loves the joke "What's the difference between a pizza and a musician? A pizza can feed a family of four." My 5yo daughter retold the joke "So there's a pizza and a musician and the pizza has kids" She was pleased that she got an even bigger laugh than DH did

8/22/2006 11:57:00 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home