Mom Hair?

For much of my life, I have gone from short hair to long hair, and back again. I am currently in the "short hair" phase, and I think it is highly likely that I will be there for the rest of my life. It's way easier, and when I grew my hair out, I realized I didn't have a clue about curling irons, barrettes, and all the other girlie hair stuff that I used to pass in the store without a second thought. So when does short hair turn from sassy and cute to mom haircut? Is it a matter of age, or cut, or have I just given in to the mom "do" without knowing it? (Note: I am under no illusion that I look like Halle Berry).


Blogger Tracy M said...

It's the perm... the perm!! Avoid them at all costs, and thus avoid the Mom-Hair!

It's like Mom-jeans. Just make sure they don't go halfway up your back, and it's all good!

8/04/2006 03:26:00 PM  
Anonymous Wendy said...

I'm so sick of doing my hair and makeup.

It's like being on a hamster wheel--I want off!

8/04/2006 03:35:00 PM  
Blogger The Wiz said...

Yes, Tracy - I figured the perm thing was bad. but you have curly hair, don't you? Does this mean you can't have short hair?

Wendy -
I only do my make-up for church and that's only if I have time. And I have short hair that takes two minutes to dry. I got off that wheel a while ago. (Oh, and for dates with DH, I throw a little lip gloss on).

8/04/2006 04:01:00 PM  
Anonymous Proud Daughter of Eve said...

When I was five, I could sit on my hair. While I've had it short since, it's good and long now and I can't imagine cutting it! Well, that's something of an overstatement. On the hot days I sometimes imagine hacking it all off with a knife but it's only a fleeting thing. I had it trimmed a couple of years ago and the stylist took off much more than I thought she would and I was in shock for a week.

The trick to surviving with long hair is updos! Forget drying-- I get my shower at night and it's ready to go in the morning.

My two current favorites:

1) Make a pony tail, preferably high on the head. Slide a hairstick (or two in my case) through the base, under the elastic at about the halfway point. Divide the pony tail in two. Lift each side up and over the hair stick then wrap in opposite directions from each other around the base until you're out of hair. Then pin. It takes practically no time at all.

2) Make a ponytail high on the head. (I've done it low but it doesn't work as well.) Pull the elastic out a bit, divide the hair at the base in half and flip the pony tail down through. You can leave it like that for a soft, waterfall-ish look or braid the pony tail, flip it up and tuck the end into the flip. Pin. Again, it takes practically no time.

I realize that practically no time is different from literally no time but hey, my hair's the only part of my body that I ALWAYS think is sexy. It's worth it for me. :)

8/04/2006 04:29:00 PM  
Blogger Alison said...

hmm, interesting question. I think a really tight perm IS a factor, but usually it seems "mom hair-cuts" are really ultra short. sort of signifying to the world that we are so frazzled that we chop off our hair b/c its just one more thing we don't have time to deal with. If you need some body, i would recommend a looser perm, also find a hairdresser that knows the current styles and can show you how to make it work for you.

8/04/2006 05:07:00 PM  
Blogger Trivial Mom said...

I think the mom haircut changes with each generation of moms. I don't think my mom has changed her hairstyle since she was 17. So what looks "sassy and cute" to us will look like the mom do in 10-20 years. It's just like the jeans that tracy m mentioned. When our mom's were growing up jeans halfway up the back was cool. So the trick I think to not having the mom hairstyle is to stay current with the trends and like alison said get a good hairdresser that is up with the trends.

8/04/2006 07:52:00 PM  
Blogger Tracy M said...

That's exactly why my hair is long. Cut it off, and it grows OUT from my head in kinkiness unimaginable. I can hide things in it, and I'm so not kidding.

I do what PDoE does, and shower at night and put it up in a knot or bun or big mess with a scrunchie. My problem is it's so dang thick, 24 hours later, if I take the knot down, it's still wet inside.

I fantasize about cutting it off each summer, when I basically have a wool hat on all the time. But, then I remember, horizontal hair is not cute.

8/04/2006 08:36:00 PM  
Anonymous Mary said...

The contrast between the two pictures totally cracked me up! My hair is either a chin-length layered cut or I grow it out to just below my shoulders before I chop it again. I can't seem to decide which I like best. My dream is to have a great stylist who could look at me and tell me what hair style would be best for me and then show me how to actually fix it! I don't quite get how to use gel or mousse. Really, anything beyond a blow dryer is beyond my abilities....

8/04/2006 10:45:00 PM  
Blogger Kage said...

wizzy, I have had short hair for 10 years now, with a longer bob hiatus for just a few months, and 16" extensions for about 6 weeks earlier this year. I think that short hair (of course depending on the cut) is anything BUT mom-hair. On the contrary, it looks "done" all the time, chic, European, and fun.

tftCarrie was contemplating a haircut the other day, and my advice was this: You would look great with short hair, BUT you can really only "pull off" long hair until you are about 40---and some of those girls from a little sitcom called Friends, are pushing it. Unless you are yasmina rossi or carmen (see Ford Models.com), you should rid yourself of long hair at an older age....this could date you.

Now if you are ready to settle in to many decades of short hair, you need to be "on it". Research, shop around for stylists, ask your honest friends about what to do with you hair, when to let it go grey etc. I think that feeling good about yourself will help the aging process...I have no idea how old you are, just giving my general ideas. My mom is 50, and she has never had better, cooler hair than now....and I know it makes her feel great about aging.

And if you are sick of your hair and makeup, pick the most put-together friend you know, and ask her to help you with a makeover.

8/04/2006 11:06:00 PM  
Blogger Mo Mommy said...

Long hair(or even medium length) is not a good look for me, so it pretty much stays short. I am always worried about morphing into old lady hair without realizing it. My personal solution? I have 2 hairstylists who are both friends and magicians with shears. They know my personality AND what looks good on me, and that's a really good starting point.

8/04/2006 11:26:00 PM  
Blogger Tammy and Parker said...

Um.....how about when it is more gray than anything else? =/

8/05/2006 01:28:00 AM  
Blogger a. nonny spouse said...

Both my mom and my dad had the same haircut the whole time I was growing up. After hearing one too many small children ask my mom, "are you a boy or a girl?" my sisters and I swore to one another we would never have the mom 'do.

But, oh, I want short hair so so bad. But, oh, I want to look like I'm not forty or male so so bad, too.

8/05/2006 01:50:00 AM  
Anonymous Liz said...

Well, I'm not a mommy yet, but I have hair so I hope you don't mind another comment!

My hair is straight, thick like crazy, grows almost an inch a month and has morphed from dirty blond to dirty brown. I can't wear a ponytail high on my head because the weight of my hair gives me a headache. Perms only half take. I'm a curling iron idiot. I love having short hair and I love having long hair.

In the past when it was long I would dream of short hair but thought my long hair was pretty, - oh dear, I've just admitted that - was not sure if I could cut it again, and my husband loves long hair. So this is the solution I finally came up with.

I grow my hair for 3-4 years so it's down my back. I ask someone I know who looks particularly sharp who does her hair. Then I go get it chopped off and donate it to Locks of Love (they make wigs for folks who can't grow hair or lost their hair for a variety of reasons). Then I start over.

The key for me has been color. I have found that getting it colored or highlighted makes it look "done" without having to do anything on a daily basis. I'm now a big fan of hair coloring.

Every few weeks it's like I have a different haircut and I know when it's long enough I'm going to cut it off. A good haircut & color often means big bucks, but it's worth it to me because I get them so infrequently.

This way I avoid the agony of whether to chop or not. I guess it's a goal.

Dorky, but true.

8/06/2006 02:44:00 PM  
Blogger The Wiz said...

kage -
Umm..I'm having a hard time reconciling your comment. Short hair is definitely not mom hair, yet, if you are over forty, you should definitely get it cut. Doesn't that translate to every - or at least most- women over 40 should have short hair? Am I reading this wrong?

8/06/2006 07:52:00 PM  
Blogger Tracy M said...

Hey Liz- I tired to donate to Locks of Love once, but they said since my hair was highlighted I couldn't do it- have they changed their stance??

Kage- I don't wanna cut my hair when I turn 40, but I don't wanna look old and dated either, and I don't want to be pooble-ish, either. (see previous comment on hyper-thick curly hair). What's a gal to do??????

8/06/2006 11:32:00 PM  
Blogger Starfoxy said...

Give it all up. Just shave your head. if I thought I could get away with it I would. My head it just too darn lumpy though.

8/06/2006 11:58:00 PM  
Blogger Kage said...

wiz, I think that as you get older, it gets harder to "pull off" long hair. If it is not modernized and updated,it might look as if you have had that same hair since high school.

In order for it not to be all about your hair, you still have to have a chic long-hair-specific good hair cut, great color (whether that is super great grey, or a good cover job) and probably pay a little attention to your makeup to look really still put together.

If it is long, grey or streaky grey, with no cut or shape, or if it is always pulled back (then what's the point of having it), then I think that is distracting, and it should be cut.

You never know how your face is going to play into the plan, and you have to be willing to evaluate how you age, and whether or not long hair is helping or hurting that process. I just think more often then not, when I see approaching 50 or 60 with long hair, it's not working....but I am open to seeing more examples of it looking rockin' hot, I just think in general it is good advice to cut it.

And I guess I have never defined mom-hair as this, more grandma-hair...the curled, permed, teased, white with a blue tint hair.

Does this clarify? I feel like I am rambling as usual

8/07/2006 07:42:00 AM  
Blogger Kage said...

ps, the texture of white and grey hair does not always lend itself to beautiful long hair. I suppose if you could do some sort of hot oil conditioning treatment, it might take some frizz out....but this is another strike against long hair in older women

8/07/2006 07:43:00 AM  
Blogger Abby said...

I had long hair for a long time and have slowly gone to super short.
I have found that the way you style is as important if not more than your cut. My husband cuts my hair (I know that is a bit scary, but desperate times call for desperate measures) And it all comes down to styling. I have totally "mom-ish" haircut, but I spice it up a bit. (And...under no circumstances should you ever get a perm if you have short hair. Never, never ,never!! Unless you are a poodle)

8/10/2006 12:51:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My wife's pushin' 50, has butt length hair, and has no plans to cut it ever. Phew! After 30 or 35, most women look more matronly with short hair. Just my 2 pennies. Oh, did anyone ever wonder what Locks of Love does with the millions of donations? I know scads of folks who have donated, yet not one who has received a wig. Might they be a scam? Seems so to me. Leonard

8/11/2006 08:17:00 PM  
Anonymous Liz said...

Tracy - I think you are right about the highlighted hair thing. Good point. Since I never blow-dry or curl my hair, no gels or mousse or anything, my hair is really healthy looking. I always ask the hair dresser if my hair is healthy enough to donate and so far it's passed. Maybe as I get more into color that will change.

8/13/2006 11:45:00 PM  
Anonymous Liz said...

Oh, I almost forgot. I actually did know a woman in Seattle who had two relatives who received free wigs from Locks of Love.

One of them was her niece. She was born with some sort of condition that kept her from being able to produce hair on her head. Sometimes it would grow, but it was sparse and wirey. Her two olders sisters had long, thick, luxurious hair. The wig was life-changing (especially for her dad actually).

Other than that I've never known anyone myself to get a wig.

8/14/2006 10:34:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Abby you are so right about the perms. I don't know how any women could think they are attractive. Especially with short hair, they look like you have a brillo pad hair. It is horrible :(
You have your husband cut your hair which I think is great. My guy is the only person I will let near my hair with scissors. He gives a great haircut. I am growing my hair longer, it is near waist length now and even though I am over 40, I have no plans to ever ask my guy to cut my hair short. I think short age ages a woman and many short haircuts are just plain frumpy. And that is why many people think it is mom hair.

2/24/2014 03:31:00 PM  

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